Commuting – The BART Way

My dear friend has yet again posted a wonderful piece of blog –  http://understandingfortytwo.blogspot.com/2011/07/ride-in-delhi-metros-pink-compartment.html And I must admit that she has done a great job in weaving a colorful landscape of the ladies compartment of the Delhi Metro.

Delhi Metro … it is a monument in itself… it represents , in many ways,  the quintessential Delhi… - It is grand… it is mystic… it is colorful… and it is loud…! And I can definitely take pride in telling that I have been a witness to this historical movement which would change the face of Delhi…. for ever… and for best…! For me, Delhi Metro has been love at first sight… there was no looking back ever… ! Metro ride is an experience… It travels through cultures… religions… and qualifications. It is a tribute to the human spirit…. to those who built it and to those who travel in it….! But now I am not in Delhi... and Metro is one of the many things that I miss about my city... !!

At times I really missed those interesting metro trips... and longed to be back in Delhi (NCR) ... and then one day .... BART happened … :)

Bay Area Rapid Transport (BART) brings the bay area together… it connects the bay area going right through the San Francisco Bay….! Considering the difficult non-uniform terrain of San Francisco bay area, the construction of BART is truly a great chapter in the history of civil engineering. The purpose of BART and Delhi Metro are exactly the same…. BART was conceptualized to handle the traffic congestion trans bay… and so was Delhi Metro … to take care of growing number of traffic bottlenecks in NCR (National Capital Region) … !

Before my first trip in BART, I had this misconception that the working population in the Bay Area do not use public transportation for commuting….! But considering the average weekday ridership of 341,151 passengers (data courtesy wiki)... I realized that… it was just that.. a misconception…. :)

Just like any other public transport… traveling in BART… is a learning experience… and more so for me…  because this is altogether a new world for me… ! As per the geography, I am globe away from my home… but as per the growth and development… I am at least a few years away …!  But the crowd that I travelled with in Delhi Metro… and the crowd I travel with now are remarkably similar… in many ways… ! In mornings... they are anxious to reach office in time... and in evening... they hurry back home...!! Sometimes they look happy and relaxed.. at others they may be sad , worried or confused..  other times they appear plain bored... excited... or even sleepy... ! I am actually amazed at the myriad of human emotions that I get to observe... and that there are as so many individuals and yet they belong together…!   And somehow... after a very long time I feel belonged... and I feel at home....!

Different phases of life...

Life evolves continuously and consistently... with every passing day... ! Today is different from yesterday... and it will not be same tomorrow...! We can,at best, categorize and classify life in phases.... And even though every 'phase' itself is in a state of flux... life can still be considered uniform to some extent and same over these small slices of time... !

I can roughly divide my life in following phases, which are distinctive and special. Each of these phases have significant contribution in my character-building and on my perspective towards life.

1. Sanehi-Sadan (My ancestral home where I grew up and completed my schooling)

2. School

3. Patna

4. Competition

5. B.I.T. (Birla Institute of Technology, Mesra)

6. Chennai

7. Newly married

8. Single in the City

9. and the present phase - 'On a break' :)

I have grown over these phases and matured gradually...! I have discovered myself... steadily and slowly... bit by bit... ! 

Every phase gets over sooner or later... and all it leaves behind are memories... some good and some bad... but irrespective... these memories are the moments that we remember from past... and they make us who we are today... ! 

Every outburst that I have... the mood swings that I get... my outlook... my reaction... my perspective... my insecurities... and my strengths... every single thing that makes me - 'me' - can be traced back to some moments in my past ... so my past explains me... and my memories are the cheat codes to unlock me and every trait of my personality... !

"Spring" is finally here...

It has been cold for a long time now... right from October end...!!! But for past two weeks ... the weather has been real bad... gloomy and chilly...!!  Though in February end... weather started to get warmer and just when we hoped to see 'Spring' finally round the corner... it took a bad turn... !! Ahhh... the daily rains... and the cloudy sky... and no sunlight... it has been real disappointing... !!

Yesterday... I checked the weather forecast for the week... and to no respite.... it would be raining for most of days in this week... !! Can't do much about it.... !! And my spring time gardening will have to wait... :( I was slowly giving up hope when I stepped into my terrace garden to check on my plants... but here I was in for a huge happy surprise... all smiles... :)) ....

I see the first blooms of the season... :) Bright Yellow... and Bright Purple...  clean and distinct... and I am ecstatic... :) Here I see...that the colors are coming back... slowly but steadily.... !! It may be bit delayed... but spring should be here soon... with all its colors and warmth... so the hope need not be lost yet... :)

I love everything about spring... I love the bright colors... I love the warmth of the sun... the clear blue skies.... and I so love that sweet scent in the air.... wow...!!

My little Ms. Sunshine

It was June 26, 2007 and we -all of us... my family- were eagerly waiting for that one phone call...!! We were keeping our fingers crossed and sincerely hoping that everything goes on fine... with my sister-in-law (my brother's wife) ... !! She was in the labor room and here - across the oceans - we were counting each moment passing by...!!

And then the most awaited phone call came... it was my brother... and he gave us the good news - actually the best I have ever heard- "It's a girl"... my uncle repeated after my brother... wow... and finally when I got the receiver ... I realized that my brother was crying and so was I...!! And it was then I knew that people DO cry even when they are overwhelmed with happiness...!! 

She was born... my daughter... the little angel...  our princess!! I loved her from that very moment... even without having seen her ... even without having heard her...!!
I love you my baby... and I will always love you...!!

She is very very special... not only because she is the most beautiful thing I have ever seen... or not only because she is the loveliest thing I have ever held... or not only because she is the precious first.. the first kid in our next generation...but because she taught us what it is to LOVE .... to love unconditionally... !!

She brightens up any bad day... she makes you forget all your troubles...!! She smiles... and that makes this world a better place to live in...!! She talks... and that makes you feel loved and belonged..!! She sings... and that alleviates all pains...!! She looks at you with those twinkles in her eyes and her innocence touches your heart...!!

She is the best gift that God could have ever given to our family. We are so blessed to have her in our lives... She is truly our little Ms. Sunshine!!

Seven years of bliss ...

Today... we complete 'seven' years since you proposed and I said 'yes' :) ... and I am so totally in love... ever since :) :)

Measure your life...

The title for the article...“How Will You Measure Your Life?” (By Clayton M. Christensen) caught my attention... and this concept of measuring ones life appeared quite unique at the first sight... but nonetheless ...very sensible and quite engrossing...!!

Such was the power of the title that it evoked a thought process... even before I could start reading the article...!! In my personal opinion, I have always been clear about my ambitions and my goals – intermediate and distant – in my life... but I had never... ever... thought about... measuring my life...!! If at all I have to measure my life... how would I do so??  What would be the parameters to measure my life... how do I do so... and above all... why do I need to??

With so full of questions....I read the article and tried to understand the author’s perspective... and it is definitely a nice read...!! Though I am not sure if I could fully grasp and implement all that the author has to say but definitely I could appreciate his perspective...!!

About Author:

Clayton M. Christensen (cchristensen@hbs.edu) is the Robert and Jane Cizik Professor of Business Administration at Harvard Business School.

Excerpts from the article:

“On the last day of class, I ask my students to turn those theoretical lenses on themselves, to find cogent answers to three questions: First, how can I be sure that I’ll be happy in my career? Second, how can I be sure that my relationships with my spouse and my family become an enduring source of happiness? Third, how can I be sure I’ll stay out of jail?”

  1. “Create a Strategy for Your Life”

 

2. “Allocate Your Resources”

 

 3. “Create a Culture”

 

4. “Avoid the “Marginal Costs” Mistake”

 

5. “Remember the Importance of Humility”

 

6. “Choose the Right Yardstick”

 
“This is my final recommendation: Think about the metric by which your life will be judged, and make a resolution to live every day so that in the end, your life will be judged a success.”

We always have choices... always...

We all have a choice when it comes to making a decision - between right and wrong. All of us have a conscience and the conscience is continuously evaluating our options and tagging each of these options - appropriately- as ‘right’ or ‘wrong’. So at any point of time, we definitely know the correct path and it is totally in our hands whether or not we follow the dictates of our conscience.

I agree that the correct choice may not always be convenient and comfortable; more often than not the right path is also the more difficult path. I also understand that not everyone can withstand the rigors and the hardship that may come with the right decision. That we consciously make the choice is my strong belief. And this ability to make the right decision and to walk the difficult terrains sets apart the heroes from the common people and makes super-humans of the mere mortals

Nobody is BORN a hero but anyone can BECOME a hero; it is totally our choice... what we CHOOSE to become. It is for us to realize that we have the power to make the change and that we have the strength to stand the adversities.

History is abuzz with the stories of the heroes and superheroes; these people made the right choice, knowing fully well that these choices may cost them their peace, the normalcy of their lives and at times even their lives. The heroes are as human as us but that they could rise above their weaknesses and flaws differentiates these people from the masses and makes them the extra-ordinary.

It is quite inspiring the way the reel life has portrayed the power of making choices, the willpower to stand despite all difficulties and the strength of character to bear the pain but not give in. 

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Green Goblin: Spider-Man. This is why only fools are heroes - because you never know when some lunatic will come along with a sadistic choice. Let die the woman you love... or suffer the little children? Make your choice, Spider-Man, and see how a hero is rewarded!
Spider-Man: Don't do it Goblin!
Green Goblin: We are who we choose to be... now, *choose*! 

• Movie: Spider man I

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Dr. Davis: You say you can't sleep. Heart break? Bad Dreams?
Peter Parker: There is one dream where in my dream, I'm Spider-Man. But I'm loosing my powers. I'm climbing a wall but I keep falling.
Dr. Davis: Oh. So you're Spider-Man...
Peter Parker: [interrupts Dr. Davis] In my dream... Actually, it's not even my dream, it's a friend of mine's dream.
Dr. Davis: Oh. Somebody else's dream. What about this friend? Why does he climb these walls? What does he think of himself?
Peter Parker: That's the problem, he doesn't know what to think.
Dr. Davis: Kind of makes you mad not to know who you are? Your soul disappears, nothing is bad as uncertainty. Listen, maybe you're not supposed to be Spider-Man climbing those walls? That's why you keep falling. You'll always have a choice Peter.
Peter Parker: [whispers] I have a choice.

• Movie: Spider man II

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Miranda Priestly: ......I never thought I would say this, Andrea, but I really, I see a great deal of myself in you. You can see beyond what people want, and what they need and you can choose for yourself.
Andy Sachs: I don't think I'm like that. I couldn't do what you did to Nigel, Miranda. I couldn't do something like that.
Miranda Priestly: You already did. To Emily.
Andy Sachs: That's not what I... no, that was different. I didn't have a choice.
Miranda Priestly: No, no, you chose. You chose to get ahead. You want this life. Those choices are necessary.

• Movie: The Devil Wears Prada

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[Travis tells Logan that he looks like a man who’s thinking about doing something he shouldn’t.]
Travis: You know what happens to men who go looking for blood?
[Logan looks at him.]
Travis: They find it.
[The farmer pauses.]
Travis: We all have a choice, son.
Logan: Well, mine got taken.
[The farmer looks hard at Logan and tells him bluntly.]
Travis: Bulls—t.

• Movie: X-Men Origins:Wolverine

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Bruce Wayne: People are dying. What would you have me do?
Alfred Pennyworth: Endure, Master Wayne. Take it. They'll hate you for it, but that's the point of Batman, he can be the outcast. He can make the choice that no one else can make, the right choice.

• Movie: The Dark Knight

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Footprints on the sands of time...

   TELL me not, in mournful numbers,

        Life is but an empty dream ! —

    For the soul is dead that slumbers,

        And things are not what they seem.

    Life is real !   Life is earnest!

        And the grave is not its goal ;

    Dust thou art, to dust returnest,

        Was not spoken of the soul.

    Not enjoyment, and not sorrow,

        Is our destined end or way ;

    But to act, that each to-morrow

        Find us farther than to-day.

    Art is long, and Time is fleeting,

        And our hearts, though stout and brave,

    Still, like muffled drums, are beating

        Funeral marches to the grave.

    In the world's broad field of battle,

        In the bivouac of Life,

    Be not like dumb, driven cattle !

        Be a hero in the strife !

    Trust no Future, howe'er pleasant !

        Let the dead Past bury its dead !

    Act,— act in the living Present !

        Heart within, and God o'erhead !

    Lives of great men all remind us

        We can make our lives sublime,

    And, departing, leave behind us

        Footprints on the sands of time ;

    Footprints, that perhaps another,

        Sailing o'er life's solemn main,

    A forlorn and shipwrecked brother,

        Seeing, shall take heart again.

    Let us, then, be up and doing,

        With a heart for any fate ;

    Still achieving, still pursuing,

        Learn to labor and to wait.

 (A PSALM OF LIFE by Henry Wadsworth Longfellow )

I recited this poem for one of the English Recitation Competition at my school. Even though I could not fully comprehend and appreciate this poem then, I loved it... I loved its lyrics... for beautiful rhyming and for picturesque wordings. And now when I read this poem... I am absolutely bowled over by the content...  it inspires... and enlightens...!! Absolutely simple... yet absolutely mind-blowing..!! This poem, just the few lines, captures the gist of whole life...!! It is so fresh... so modern....!! So realistic in the present context that at times I am surprised that it was penned down as early as October 1838.

That this poem is contemporary to our times....tells that... though world has changed...  and that we have changed... and also our outlooks... priorities... beliefs... and everything... but still the true meaning of life has not changed... over these years... rather the centuries...!!

I believe that the real meaning of the life can never change...it is passed on from one generation to next...  knowingly or unknowingly...!! Our generation is following the footprints left behind by the past generations... and the coming generations will follow ours...!!

And miles to go before I sleep...

The woods are lovely, dark and deep,

But I have promises to keep,

And miles to go before I sleep,

And miles to go before I sleep.

                                  - Robert Frost

I don't remember when I read these lines ... for the first time... but for long... these have been my favorites. Just four lines... and they define life perfectly... :) So beautiful... and so simple yet so meaningful... and so complete!!

Life is a journey... and each of us is a lonely traveler... and we have to continually walk ahead... and when we stop...we seize to exist anymore...!!

Yes... It's a journey... of gradually growing up...of continuously evolving.... and of attaining the wisdom...!! It's unique because... there are no destinations...to this!! It's a journey... through and through :) ... And the beauty is... that everyone is journeying... inherently, even without realizing it… and that we do not have any choices or options... it’s compulsory... and the very essence of our being!!

In life... everyone is for himself or herself... we are always alone...!! We live with people... we live among people... but still each of us has a different and a unique path to tread...!! No two people can ever be together in the same space... time and context...!! It’s weird... right?? I know...!! But I have thought over it... again and again... and this belief has only grown stronger...!! Even when we are together.... like... celebrating a festival... or watching a movie... or simply talking.... each of us still has a distinct identity... either in space or time or context....!!

It’s a continuous travel... and there are no stops... :) ....Every second of every minute of every hour of every day... and even when we are apparently not doing anything... we are still walking.... it’s a travel through time... and we are always traveling ahead... there are no looking back :)

The day... we reach our destination... our journey comes to an end and so does the life... because this journey is nothing but the LIFE itself!!

Hope is a strange thing...

Its Monday today ... and now for third Monday in the row... I have Monday blues... :(... I feel tired.... and somewhat drained... :( I was HOPING to catch up on some sleep over the weekend... but somehow I could not.... so now my brain is sending signals... that I am tired... :) I know and understand... that this feeling of tiredness is more a perception than reality... :)

This happens all the times... whenever we pin our HOPE at something and we do not get it... then we are disappointed... and it pains us...!! Now this pain can be as insignificant as tiredness... or crankiness... but at times ... it can also be huge... frustration... and anger...!!

Did we not feel terrible when we did not get the promotion (at the work place) that we were so hoping for...?? Did it not hurt us when one of our good friends forgot to wish us on our birthday... and we hoped that he or she would send a gift :)?? Were we not angry when India lost in a cricket match to Pakistan... that we so hoped India to win??

Whether the hope is for a small and rather insignificant thing... or it is for something that has a life changing effect.... if our hope is not fulfilled... it has bothered us... it has pained us... it has made us sad... !! At many a times the root cause of our ‘pain’... is our ‘hope’...!!

But this is not the conclusion… there is another side to this coin... another part of this story... and that is... at times... HOPE has been the sole life force... that has helped us sustain ... and motivated us to continue in the toughest of the situations...!!

It is only because we hope that there is light at the other end of the dark tunnel that we get the strength to walk through it...!!

Is it not only because we hope... that next time we would be promoted... that we still continue to work...?? Is it not because we hope that our dear friend would be there for us always... that we forgive him or her... for forgetting our birthday...?? At times we feel that everything is lost.... and that... now we can endure no more... but we still hold on... because deep down we have this HOPE that... this too shall pass...!!

Though I have quoted insignificant examples... but I hope to bring significant attention to the context :)!!

Yes... we hope and so... we are... really!! It’s the hope… that keeps us sane amidst maddening situations... gives us strength to look beyond and wait for a better future... however at times it even hurts us... makes us feel desperate...!! At times hope helps us have confidence... happiness... dreams... aspirations... patience... and also at times pain...despair... frustration... anger... agitation... and hopelessness... :)

It is quite strange as how HOPE invokes a wide spectrum of feelings and emotions... and how it keeps us humane... :)!!

Begining of a new life...

That one day... and my life changed for ever... :)

Wow... what a day it was...!! Sometimes when I look back... I am amazed... did it actually happen...??

Yes... it did... and it did change everything...!! Literally everything... my home... my identity... my commitments... relationships... priorities... above all... it changed me...!!

What was ‘it’ that brought all these change??
The rituals...???
Or the seven vows...???
Is it the “Sindoor” (vermilion)??
Was it the “Pheras” (the seven steps that are taken jointly by the bride and groom)??

I do not know yet ... I am still exploring!!!

Her daughters need no father....!!

She has done it again.... and I am so proud of her... very proud.

She brought hope and happiness not only to herself, Renee and Alisha... but to all of us... and to all those kids who are still waiting for a home...! Fairytales sure does happen :)... !!

No prizes for guessing... of course she is our own...Miss Sushmita Sen...!!

In 1994, when she won Ms Universe title... she was the first Indian to achieve the coveted title...!! And it was awesome...!!

On June 30, 2000, she was exemplary again... may be one of very few (can be the first as well...! not sure though)... when court handed her daughter Renee...!!

She became the first again on 19 Dec 2009 ... when she adopted her second daughter... Alisha!! :)

Law did not make it any easier for her... She had adopted her first child Renee under Hindu Adoption and Maintenance Act, which does not permit a person to adopt a second child of the same gender. Last year, however, the court had passed an order that allowed a person to adopt a second child of same sex under the Juvenile Justice (JJ) Act, so much to her happiness!!!

She epitomizes womanhood... Strength, Independence, Responsibility, Affection, Intelligence, Confidence, Determination, Grit and Love...!! She has been a role model throughout.

She has proved that... to be a Mother... you have to feel like one...!! That is enough... and nothing else matters... !! :)

Kudos to you lovely lady... you make me real proud that I am a woman!! :)